L's Freedom Story

After a few years of restricting and over exercising, I started binging. Slowly they were getting bigger and bigger and becoming more frequent.

I had no idea what was going on and I thought I was crazy! I couldn’t understand what was going on, why my willpower was failing me, why I had done so well before exercising and restricting and it was becoming impossible.

I felt hopeless and ashamed and like I had no way of getting out.

I found Lydia’s videos and read [a book Lydia mentioned on her videos]. I did the [the study course that went along with the book] about a year before [Lydia's program], while it helped me lay the boundaries, I was becoming more frustrated that it wasn’t working for me- continuing to add evidence to the fact I was broken and would live like this forever.

Before [Lydia's program] I had no freedom around food- I thought that because my binges weren’t as bad as they had been in the past then maybe that was as good as it could be.

I would still feel hijacked by food, eating much more than I knew I needed. I feared being hungry and still worried about how much food I would need to eat and where it would come from, each day. I still spent too much time and energy thinking about food and was frustrated that I felt I should be doing better.

I felt lost, hopeless, broken and as if I was living someone else’s life. I didn’t trust myself to know what I wanted to eat or when I would be full. I’d wake up each morning and dread it, as I wouldn’t know what kind of day I was going to have and by the end if I’d feel like I’d have a ‘good day’ or ‘bad day’ and if I’d end up going to sleep that night feeling shame, regret and thinking I could start again tomorrow.

I had no idea how different life would be 8 weeks later [doing Lydia's program], it’s better than I could ever have thought it would be.

I genuinely feel free around food- and I had no idea what that would be like as I couldn’t comprehend it. Food isn’t a big deal anymore, I’m able to eat with much more allowance and am working to accept that this doesn’t mean I’ll eat perfectly.

My relationship with my body has also changed, I hated my body before, and just wanted to get back to the body I thought should have, thoughts that were keeping me trapped in the same cycle. Now, my body hasn’t changed but I accept it- it’s the only one I’ve got. 

I have been able to enjoy loads of different activities and environments that would have caused me so much stress and anxiety- such as weddings, holidays and going away on road trips.

I’ve done them all and food hasn’t even been an issue, I’ve enjoyed the time spent with people I love. I can’t believe how much progress is made in a relatively short space of time and how quickly the principles can start to apply to other areas of my life. As is said in the program - ‘once you see something it can’t be unseen.’ The ideas about perfectionism and giving yourself wagons to fall off can apply to so many things I do.

S's Story

I have had food issues since I was in middle school. I was NOT overweight, but I was a teenager in the Twiggy days---and compared to her, I was chubby. When I got to college, I decided to go on a reasonably healthy diet--sort of like the diabetic exchange program--or low carbs. Not a specific plan---just 3 meals a day. I felt great and lost 55 pounds. What happened though, was that I didn't know how to maintain that weight---so when I got "too thin" I started to binge on sweets---something I hadn't had in 9 mos. So that started a cycle of binging, restricting, over exercising and other purging. That went on --on and off--for 40 years. My weight was stable--so no one really noticed or knew---which was part of the problem. I looked "normal" but my relationship with food was horrible. Food occupied every free moment I had---I was very able to have a career, be a mom, be a wife---but every other moment was FOOD FOCUSED. Everything revolved around food. 

I instinctively knew that this was not because of this or that stress. Food never made whatever was the stress of the day better--the binging only made the urge go away---everything else was still there. Work wasn't easier---family issues still arose---food didn't help. Binging made it harder to work through issues because I was not focused on the "issue"---rather I was focused on the urges and eating. Binging stole my attention from LIFE. 

I tried therapy, OA, hypnosis, meditation, religion, whatever was available. I found Beat the Binge through Kathryn Hansen's program. After I listened to her book, I looked up programs based on those principles---and I found Lydia. What appealed to me was the one on one program--Kathryn doesn't offer that and I believed I needed the personal relationships to really be accountable and to know that I was like other people in this program. 

As a lawyer, I am a cynical person, so for awhile I wasn't sure that this was working---but I made an investment in myself and I would not give up. This program does work and it's because of the principles and the live support. This program requires work, moment by moment application of the principles--but freedom and recovery is worth the time and effort.

I am clearly more free!!! So many things are different. First, identifying chatter and learning to detach and not believe the stories chatter was spinning. I began to realize that chatter's stories were hooking me and I learned to use my higher brain to make better choices and to use what the chatter was saying was data/information.

By practicing the principles, calling in my celebrations, calling in my wobbly moments, going to Q&A sessions, leaving lots of [messages for my coach]---my relationship with food is so different. I don't believe "you can start tomorrow" any more. I don't believe "you need to wait until after this holiday, this party, this meeting, etc". If I slip, I leave posts and get right back into the program---I don't wait until a better day. If my slip was at lunch---I haven't "blown the whole day". I already knew what I liked to eat---I knew how to eat adequately, but I didn't practice those healthy non-restrictive habits because of a nasty habit. This program has helped me to go back to nourishing my body regularly and allowing myself to have celebrations meals/foods--I can eat what I want--what serves me, my body, my situation. 

I didn't come to this program to lose weight. Weight was not my issue---I was willing to gain some weight to have freedom. I didn't weigh myself during the program--but I did step on the scale today (which I haven't done in 30 years except when I go to the doctors) and I can tell you I didn't gain any weight. I didn't lose any. I stayed where I was and learned how to nourish my body and my mind and my spirit.

Body image issues---I am older so with age, I've learned to be ok with my body and my wrinkles. I have learned to look at peoples faces, hair, clothes, eyes---and listening to WHO they are. I don't look at bodies or color or age. I try to look inside to see who people are. This wonderful program and group of women have reinforced this focus.

I still have to apply these principles. I am going to go back to the milestones and start from the beginning and I know I will see new things each time I listen to the milestones, listen to the stories, share in the grad group.

J's Story

I remember staying up late at night watching tv in high school, and eating. Later, during and after college, staying up late, watching tv and eating, regardless of whether I was hungry or not, was fun for me. Although I'm not certain how fun it really was...but it was rebellious, and I liked that a lot.

I never purged, and once I didn't live at home with my parents, often I binged just as part of a meal - regularly eating beyond fullness at a meal.

My mother is a restrictive eater, however she has managed to remain quite thin for her entire life; she is now in her early 90s. As I started gaining weight (due to overeating/bingeing) in my 40s, this opened up a whole emotional can of worms between us, as I gained more and more weight and moved further away from the person my mother thought I should be.

During a particularly stressful time in my life - my early 40s - I was single-parenting two school-aged daughters, working part-time and going to university full-time. It took me 5.5 years to get my degree, but it was so worth it, and I did really enjoy the learning. And, almost every day at school I would eat a huge lunch with dessert, and have a large hot chocolate - I felt I deserved it, it was a way of soothing myself thru the stressers of my life.

I can see now that this is where I solidified the habit of turning to food for soothing.

Although many things improved in my life once I had my degree, many stressers remained, and I continued to overeat and binge. Food was a stressful element in my parenting, as I didn't really enjoy preparing food for my kids, but I didn't have money to eat out or buy prepared foods. I feel guilty for all the food craziness I perhaps passed on to my daughters.

I do remember one time going out to a nice restaurant with two close girlfriends, and bingeing right there at the table on the delicious bread and olive oil. When I reached for my fourth piece and drenched it in olive oil, I could sense my friends exchanging a look. I remember feeling all kinds of emotions coming up, and I just stuffed that bread in my mouth, and then ate a huge meal.

During my mid-40s, perhaps as a reaction to all the hot chocolates, I cut out all sugar from my diet. And I really, truly, did - for 4.5 years, I ate no sugar, honey, maple syrup, etc, and I hardly ever used artificial sweeteners. Maybe a diet soda once a month or so. Actually now, I cannot imagine how I succeeded, but I did. But I stuffed myself with bread, pasta, cheese, rice...on and on (it was during this period that I had that dinner with friends, described above). And I gained 35 pounds in those 4.5 years, despite the fact that I was also a fitness instructor, and teaching/working out many times per week. I am now aware that I was burning out, and think I knew it at the time, but did not know how to change or get out of the downward cycle. I eventually gave up teaching fitness when I felt I was just too fat to be a realistic role model for students. And I went back to eating sugar, and have been eating it several times per day ever since (until this program!). And once I gave up teaching, I gave up exercising altogether - that strategy had failed too.

So, it's been 10 years since I last taught an exercise class, and 18 or so years since I started noticeably putting on weight. Just a few days, maybe a week and a half, before I found Lydia's program, I was getting ready to sign up for Brightline Eating, a restrictive eating program based, I think, on some commonly accepted restrictions in Overeaters' Anonymous. I was absolutely dreading starting the program, and couldn't imagine that I would be able to stick to it, but I was desperate and felt I had to try something serious and commit to it for real. I have never dieted, never used a scale, as I always knew that I had to "fix" something about me, or my life, and my eating would take care of itself. I've had YEARS of therapy, self-help, and I spent a few years (and many dollars) on a program that specifically teaches how to question our thoughts (The Work of Byron Katie). But the always hoped-for side effect of losing my eating disorder never materialized. So I thought I had to go back to addressing eating specifically.

Thank goodness I found Lydia's program, as it does specifically address eating, but it addresses our THOUGHTS about eating.

The program helped me to take so much of my mental energy and focus OFF food, and think about and do other things.

I am MUCH more free, I have more mental energy and attention, and I feel like the old me has been uncovered.

I have more physical energy - I have exercised spontaneously several times during the 8 weeks, and I have also done a lot of physical work on a new home I bought. I would have been wiped out by these physical efforts if it were not for the Beat the Binge program.

Food comes in to my mind mostly only when I'm hungry or planning a meal - and that planning is no longer obsessive and crazy. I live alone, so meals can be really anything I want, and since uncovering my restriction chatter, I really have opened up to so much more enjoyment of food, while (maybe paradoxically) thinking about it less.

I have had a few meals where I overate, and I binged a time or two in the last 8 weeks, but the program is so helpful in learning to just MOVE ON. No wagon [to fall off of], just calling out the chatter, allowing, coming back again and again to my desire to be free.

M's Story

I decided to join because I have been struggling for over 20 years with eating disorders. 80% of my brain was busy thinking of food and how to lose weight. I couldn't even imagine starting studying at 35 years old with this obsession going on in my head. I was isolating myself and so ashamed and disgusted of myself.

My body image was absolutely horrible and I felt like I wasn't Worth of being seen and loved with this over weight.

The program helped me to accept my body the way it is right now and I actually enjoy doing shopping and taking care of me now.

My binge crisis are gone and I feel confident that if it happens again some day I would just write down the data and move on. I'm a normal person and I'm working on adding new healthy habits in my mind and everyday life.

I have my joy back and the way I see other women, overweight or not, just with their own body, has totally changed. I literally find each and every woman beautiful.

Today, I feel ready to meet my future husband and be a good mom.

During the process, I could see my habits changing only because of practicing, and I think it is absolutely unbelievable!

TA's Story

I feel like I have had an eating disorder most of my life. I always remember my mum being on a diet which I quickly joined the bandwagon. From there it was years of on and off binging. In the last 5 years I can't remember a week going by without binging.
Before finding Lydia's program I had hit the wall and really felt like there was nothing more I could do. I had tried other forms of treatment but NOTHING worked. It always felt like I was broken and like something was really wrong with me. I was made to feel that I would always have an eating disorder and it is my job to learn how to deal with it.
Food consumed my mind, I was always thinking about what I would eat next, what I wasn't allowed to eat and what diet I needed to go on to lose the most weight. Binging stopped me from loving life! Stopped me from exercising, going out with friends,, relationships and just living.
I felt so worthless, I just wanted it to stop so bad but the more I tried to stop the worse it would get.

The thing that surprised me the most is how easy the concepts are. As soon as you know them you put them into practice and your brain starts changing almost instantly. I am so much more aware of my thoughts and I love it!! I have control of my brain and can think about the things that I want to think about. My relationship with food has changed so much - it is just food!!! I can eat what I want when I want and its no big deal!
I have my life back. I can be spontaneous, not have to stick to a routine or diet plan and just do the things that make me happy. I move my body because I enjoy the exercise not because I feel like I have to restrict.

S's Story

My before story is this: feeling bad and wrong in my body from aged 6 (despite being a totally normal size), going on diets from aged 10. Putting on. Losing. Putting on. Losing. Decades passing.

Now in my late 40s. Restricting is too hard and my only recourse is constant overeating in a grazing way. Body hatred. Feeling trapped and wrong. Feeling like I've let down the people I love. Feeling like I am going to be punished for having no self control.

Basically: a living nightmare.

My now story: I am learning that I have a choice. That I can eat too much if I want but I am learning more and more that, on the whole, I prefer not to do that. I am learning that I am allowed to move my body - even though I have decades of shame around it for being the 'wrong' size. I am learning that trust is a thing I have lacked so much over all these years.

I am realizing that I can learn to trust myself, trust myself with food, trust that I am ok. And none of this involves perfection. I have learned that the more perfect I aspired to be, the further and further away I was getting from perfection. In fact, there is no such thing. I am learning to stay present and call out the chatter now: not when I'm smaller, not when I'm in perfect health. Now.

AM's Story

I started binging when I was 18 years old (and I'm now almost 34!). I was spending a year abroad after high school and I started putting on weight. Up until this point I had never worried about my weight or the food I ate as I had always been slim and athletic. I decided that restricting my food would be a good idea, and I started to severely restrict what food I was eating, as well as my calorie intake. I also began going to a gym for the first time in my life. And then I started binge eating.

At first it started out more like comfort eating, a cookie here, a chocolate bar there, a couple of extra pieces of cake at lunchtime. But before long I was eating huge quantities of food in secret and then restricting and exercising super hard the next day in order to compensate. I even tried to purge, but thankfully that was something I was never able to do.

I thought that when I got back home and back to normal life, my eating and weight would go back to normal too, but if anything it just got worse. I had become a totally different person too - I was withdrawn, moody, controlling, selfish, secretive and just down right mean a lot of the time. I didn't like who I had become and I didn't really know this person. So much had changed in just one year.

Over the years I continued to battle with the restrict / binge cycle. I would lose weight through concerted effort and then before I knew it I would be binging and putting on all the weight I had lost.

I can't even say how many times I repeated this cycle, each time feeling more hopeless and despondent than the last. It affected my whole life, I didn't want to socialize with friends or family, I shut myself off, I stayed in a bad relationship for years because I didn't think I was worthy of anyone better, food and exercise and being in control was my whole life.

I couldn't do anything spontaneous as that was not part of my routine, eating slightly off plan would spiral me into a binge. I certainly couldn't go away for weekends or on holidays without feeling incredibly anxious or binging.

I am incredibly ashamed to say that I stole food from my flatmates, ate food out of a rubbish bin, drove like a mad women because I was more concerned about stuffing my face with food when I was driving, missed out on important social events because I had either binged or felt fat and worthless and let friendships deteriorate - but this was the reality of what my life was like as a binge eater.

There were definitely times where I thought I can't do this anymore, I don't care if I get fat, I just can't continue in this cycle. So I would loosen the control and eat in a way I thought was normal, but I was still emotionally restricting and feeling guilty about everything I ate and before long I was feeling so uncomfortable with my body that I would fall back into restrictive behaviours, ramp up the exercise and was back in a diet and restrict mindset.

Through this whole period of dieting / restricting / over exercising and binging I sought help, I was desperate to find a solution and end my disorder. I spent so much time and money on therapy, personal trainers, homeopathy, naturopathy, colonic hydrotherapy, self help books, hypnotherapy, regression therapy, meal plans, exercise plans.....you name it I tried it.

And none of it worked.

I really had lost all hope that I would ever find a way out of this awful cycle. I really believed that I would have to live with this for the rest of my life.

But I guess part of me was not willing to give up hope, I kept doing google searches on how to recover from binge eating. It was a couple of years ago that I came across Brain over Binge. I bought the book and read it in a couple of days. It gave me renewed hope and it really resonated with me.

I intellectually understand what Katherine was talking about but when it came to putting her principles into practice it just wasn't clicking for me.

I can't even recall how I came across Lydia, but as soon as I did and started watching her videos I just knew that this was the right thing for me. It was at least a year before I really thought ok, I want to do this.

I put off signing up for a breakthrough session countless times because I was scared or came up with excuses that it wasn't the right time for me to commit to something like this. I think part of me was also petrified of letting go of a habit I'd had for the past 15 years. It was a part of me, part of my identity and if I wasn't a binge eater, then who was I?

When I found out I was pregnant, that was when I made the decision that I had to do this. It was time to take another leap of faith and find my freedom. It wasn't just me anymore who would be seriously affected by my eating disorder if I didn't deal with it find a solution.

I did not want my child to grow up learning bad habits or seeing their mum obsess over food and exercise or wonder why their mum didn't eat the same meals as they did. The future health and well-being of my child was so paramount and was the final push I needed to make the decision to be free of this for good and to take that plunge. I wanted to be able to be an amazing role model for my child and to be someone they could look up to.

Scheduling that breakthrough session and joining the program was the best decision I have ever made and I can truly say that with my hand on my heart. It hasn't been easy, there have been days where the thoughts of restriction and binging have been overwhelmingly strong, and there have been times where I have binged.

But after 8 weeks I know I will never go back to the way I was. I don't want to. There are still things I have to work on and there are aspects of my eating I'd like to keep improving, but binging has lost its appeal.

The desire to binge is no longer there. I now eat the same meals as my husband, I allow myself to eat whatever I want and I have been surprised at my natural desire to eat well, to eat fresh food, but to eat normal food.

I have always had a sweet food but I can embrace that now and know that it's ok for me to eat something sweet every day if that's what I enjoy doing. There is no punishment, no deprivation, no obsessing and no meal plans.

I've completely relaxed around exercise as well. I've found what I enjoy doing and what works for me and I probably exercise more consistently now than I did when I had a rigid exercise routine and was forcing myself to exercise in a way that I thought I had to, but that only depleted my energy and left me feeling drained and lethargic.

My journey is by no means over. This is just the beginning, but in 8 weeks I feel like I have found my true self again, I have gotten my life back, I have regained energy and enthusiasm and I feel optimistic about my future.

Lydia, I honestly cannot thank you enough for being you, for creating a program that results in true freedom, for your honesty, your positivity, your quirky videos, your understanding, your wisdom and your encouragement and for creating a community of like minded and inspiring women. From the bottom of my heart, thank you!!!

K's Story

I remember the first time I was obsessed with food and binged. I was only 5 years old. I was in pre-school and I stayed inside and kept eating - I couldn't stop - while I watched the other kids outside playing at recess. Even at that young age, I knew that was not normal, but I didn't know how to stop. My family tried to put me on diets. It only made me more obsessed with eating.

I'm now in my 40's, so I have spent a large chunk of my life feeling like a prisoner to dieting, food obsession, overeating and binging.

I remember in the eighth grade feeling so bad about my weight I literally wanted to die. And I was only 142 pounds, which would put me in a normal weight range.

Fast forward to my life right before joining Lydia's program - I'm at the heaviest weight of my life (definitely NOT in the normal healthy weight range), I'm more obsessed with food than ever, I'm spending countless hours and dollars trying to find the right way to eat, and I'm starting to isolate myself from friends and activities because I'm so embarrassed by the way I look and eat. I was becoming miserable, exhausted by this craziness nothing has helped me shake, and I'm afraid for my health.

I'm very successful in every other area of my life, but this area had me flummoxed!

I knew my life was about more than this food obsession, but I didn't know how to fix it. No diet, program or therapist had ever helped me stop acting so crazy with food!

I'm so grateful for this program. Finally, a SOLUTION to stop the food craziness and find freedom! I am no longer experiencing the urge to binge. For me, even better is the fact that I don't think about food that much anymore. It's quite liberating! I used to feel so obsessed about it. Now I can enjoy what I eat and then forget about it until I'm hungry again.

Another benefit I'm experiencing is that I'm feeling more accepting of my body and am being more social again. I'm no longer letting how I look prevent me from living life. And I know that I won't be eating (or trying not to eat) in a way that is embarrassing. Potlucks, parties, and dinners out are now just fine. I'm able to be around food, yet pay attention to the company I'm with and the conversations we're having.

One of the biggest surprises to me is how simple this process is. Yet it's so effective. And I've been practicing it in areas not even related to eating and it's helping me. For example, I tend to experience strong anxiety about flying. It begins long before my flight. So I started using these principles to help with the anxiety about an upcoming trip and it's working!

This program is opening up a whole new world. Most of my life I believed there was something fundamentally wrong with me, that I was broken. Now I know I am completely normal and I just had a habit that didn't serve me. I can change my brain. It's not difficult, and it doesn't take that long, either. I just needed to learn how to do it and get the support I needed. Which I got, thanks to this program.

I feel like I have a new lease on life, and I only just graduated. I feel normal around food most of the time now. And when I don't, I practice what Lydia taught me and it works. I feel more accepting of my body. This has given me more physical energy which feels very good. I'm spending more time with friends, and I have more emotional energy to devote to my marriage. And, with many hours a week I've freed up from researching the latest diet or "way of eating" I have more time to spend on my business as well.

Thank you Lydia for creating this program. I can't wait until everyone knows there's a simple, elegant, effective way to overcome the food crazies, and people know there is nothing wrong with them. It's just habits we've developed and there is a remedy.

A's Freedom Story

Prior to doing Beat the Binge, I was binging around 4 times a week but it was more like an all day graze binge vs. sitting down to a pile of food, though I have done that previously as well.

There was a lot of secrecy to it still as I was ashamed I wasn't able to lose weight any longer or stick to a diet or food plan of any type at all. I have done counseling and different "healthy" food plans and "intuitive eating" and studied binge eating on my own before it was even an "eating disorder," and read a lot of self-help books, and stewed over the behavior for about 12 years.

I began binge eating late in high school. It was a meal here or there, not frequent. This behavior followed a 3-year stint of anorexia which had me down about 90 pounds as a freshman and sophomore in high school. In college there were a lot of life changes happening - I had lost my identity in sports and was trying to figure out my place in the world. I was a strong student and had the perfect apartment and held a solid job but the one thing that was out of control was food!

I worked for a raw foodist and was vegan for a time and this is when the binge eating was completely out of control!

I gained around 100 pounds through all of college. It was losing 30 pounds here, gaining 60 pounds there, losing 20 pounds...the swings were drastic.
This cycling continued to happen out of college and into my career. I landed a fantastic job that brought me into a good community with fun roommates and travel galore. The binging leveled out a bit for a few years and I was getting more active again and lost about 60 of the 100 pounds I had gained - life felt exciting!

I still wasn't happy with my body, even at my skinniest and fittest - the goal of perfect was always out of reach.

I am naturally a larger female - 6'2" and easily put on muscle mass and mass in general - there is nothing really dainty about me.

I knew that this want to be super skinny did not sit well with my conscious - I have always been one to fight for the people on the fringe - why did I have these feelings of hate against myself because I couldn't mold my body into the shape I wanted it to be in - why did I even want it to be that shape? This didn't resonate with my belief of loving everyone and everyone having value or my belief that women are WAY more than just something pretty to look at.
My insides were at war and I felt responsible!

Little did I know...we have "two brains" ; ) Four years ago I had my son and 2 years ago I got married. Having these two loves in my life were the mirror I needed to keep searching for a solution.

I have had a lot of healing in my life over the last 4 years but the binging was still there. I was brought to the point of just wanting freedom in my life - I had stopped dieting and just wanted to "eat normally." I "didn't care" if I lost all the weight I had put on over the years, I just wanted to be done with the anxiety around food that years of "good food, bad food" diets had brought into my life.

I wasn't completely free of the desire to want to be thin that lingered and I wasn't able to stop binging just by quitting the harsh restricting - it got slightly better in the last year after watching Lydia's youtube videos and all of the other support interviews she has with people like Isabelle Foxen Duke - but the binges were still hanging on.

After the 8 week program, I can say with certainty that my brain has changed.

My behavior is completely different around food. I haven't binged in weeks and I am working on overeating, though even that has changed for the better as well.

My relationship with my husband is stronger after learning these tools and now knowing that I am not hiding anything from him.
I don't have guilt or shame when I eat, like I used to after eating literally anything. I don't have guilt or shame around having "chatter" or "crazy thoughts," I am confident I have the tools to call it out and just look at it knowing it isn't really "me."

I have tasted freedom and there is nothing better. Love is freedom, the opposite of love is manipulation - I can confidently say I do not desire to manipulate my body at all - which is a huge step closer to loving it.

I also feel better about people - just being in the beat the binge program with these other AMAZING women was so heartwarming - I haven't ever been in a community like it.

We all share in this journey together and it is amazing to see women encouraging each other and celebrating wins together and just loving the new freedom we are experiencing.

The biggest surprise I got from the program was the layers of freedom. Not only am I free from binging, I am free from judgment of myself and my thoughts and perfectionism, I am free from the shackles that society imposes on women and mothers, I know how to navigate my thought life, I know how to problem solve better in relationships...the list goes on and on.

-A

T's Freedom Story

My mother often missed meals and I remember her clearly weighing herself and being very fed up that she couldn't get under 9stone. My father also always commented on women's weight and looks and the worse thing you could do as a woman is to be fat. We were not allowed chocolate or treats and so I remember trying to eat as many as possible whenever I could then my first proper diet was at 14 at boarding school when a friend and i decided we would just eat an orange a day which was successful and I had anorexic tendencies and ended up being expelled from school at 15 and one of the reasons was that I wasn't eating.

I know now this was possibly as a result of being sexually and physically abused by the priest at boarding school between 11-13 but I basically blocked those 2 years out of my brain completely. Once home I quite quickly started bingeing.

Then for the next 25 years I binged 2-3 times per week but wasn't overweight, even after having twins. I was however, always on a diet, obsessed with food and what I looked like and felt overweight even though I wasn't.

Then when i turned 40 I had a breakdown when my daughter reached that age i have been abused at boarding school and that is when the bingeing and my physical health got really out of control.

My weight went up very quickly and I went up and down by 3-4 stone and the diets I did got more extreme - complete meal replacement shakes for 3-4months at a time or every other day fasting as I couldn't seem to do anything less extreme - so basically starving and bingeing every other day. As they were so extreme the bingeing and bounce back was always fast and furious and I worried that I could burst my stomach or really injure myself and I was so ashamed as my weight went so obviously up and down but I couldn't talk to any of my friends or family about it.

I then started having therapy and that really helped but didn't completely sort the bingeing although it was much less as i had also pretty much stopped restricting. However, getting in touch with Lydia was the final piece in the puzzle for me to find the freedom I so desperately wanted all this time.

Now I feel free! I don't think about food all day and I don't have any of the overwhelming urges that i used to have all the time. I only had one minor binge in the 8 weeks working with Lydia so it was almost instant help for me.

I am still working on body image as having been slim for the majority of my life until the last 15 years I still wish I could be slimmer but that is getting much better and having bought new clothes has helped alot with that.

I feel so much happier at home with my family and don't have the mood swings that bingeing made me have - I feel I am in my relationships and am more loving rather than most of my thoughts being on either trying to get food or avoid food.

I, like everyone, was so scared i was broken and it wouldn't work for me and I would have wasted my savings. Such simple principles and knowing that even if I have a slip and binge that i know the way out is amazing. I am much calmer and although I say I would like to lose weight I know that my body will find the set point that it is meant to be in its own good time and i am happy with that. THANK YOU LYDIA!!

-T

D's Story of Freedom

My Binge Eating Disorder started when I was in my early teens. At that time, the fact that my parents talked about weight loss and commented about people's appearance (although never toward me) made me self-conscious about my weight and want to diet. That lead me to the Binge Eating cycle, where I would restrict during the day and binge or overeat almost everyday at night, and finish by using laxative. That period lasted until the end of high school and started again 2 years ago.

In summer 2015, I lost weight because I started doing a lot of biking in the city (which I enjoy), and felt really good about it. In order to maintain the weight or to keep losing more, I started to control what I ate. I would count the calories to make sure that I went to bed hungry. I even created a daily calorie limit for myself (funny for me now). Following that, I continued to lose weight for one year until fall 2016, when I started to Binge Eat again.

At the beginning, it didn't affect much my life because I Binge Eat once a week or 2 weeks, I could "cope" with that (I made sure to eat much less the next days and my weight stayed the same).

In August 2017, coming back from a trip (where I restricted a lot), my episode of Binge Eating became more frequent (3 times a week). That is where I started to attach much more meanings and emotions to this habit. On one hand, food has a capital importance in my life. For example, if I go out to eat with friends or my boyfriend, I will make to to choose the "best" restaurant or meal. I would look at the menu way before going, and even after that, I would be indecisive about what to choose in the restaurant. And when I ordered a meal that was not as good as I thought it was, I became frustrated and disappointed. I would also restrict myself during the day to be able to eat more in the restaurant.

When I am in a BE mode, I (my lower brain) feel so compelled, excited at the idea of eating without limit. On the other hand, I will feel horrible after a binge. Physically, I feel bad, and couldn't do anything for the rest of the day. I couldn't be physically in shape for the next days too.

There were times where I wonder if I would die one day of BED. Mentally and emotionally, I would feel regret, worthless, unproductive, and useless as a person. I typically BE alone at home between the end of class in the afternoon and before my boyfriend came back from his job. I will especially feel so bad and worthless for him to come home to a girlfriend who just eat. It impacted also my social life and my studies. I will procrastinate on my school work, and lower my standard and effort. There are many social opportunities with friends I cancelled, classes I skipped, or work days I missed because I want to BE or feel bad the day after a binge. There is a lot of things I enjoy that I just don't "feel" like doing anymore, things as simple as taking a walk with my boyfriend in our neighborhood. In beginning of 2018, there was a day I told myself I cannot continue like that because I could see myself handicapped with this BED for my whole life, living miserably.

I know I have potential and dreams I want to achieve, so I reached out for help to Lydia's team by scheduling a breakthrough session.

After the program, I feel so much better around food. First, I don't BE anymore, and even if I do in the future, it won't be a big deal because I have the tools to bounce back quickly.

It is incredible to realize that I don't even want the thing that bring me #1 pleasure before. I restrict much less than before, and if even I do restrict, I can spot the restriction chatter and quickly have clarity around that.

Being in the program made me realize how miserably hungry I was before because of all the restriction (to not gain weight), so I am really happy now. I am also able to truly eat what I want and rediscover my taste around food.

Before, I would eat things because they are low in calories or feel pressured to finish food before they go bad in the fridge. Also, I thought I really love dessert and ice cream, but now that I truly allow myself to eat everything, I am not as crazy about sugar as I once was.

As for my body, it became a reliable partner for me because I can trust its hunger and fullness signal, and my metabolism came back too. I started to see myself differently. There was one day I looked myself in the mirror and thought: "maybe I am prettier curvier" (I loved that new appreciation).

Lydia was amazing in teaching us these principles that even made us change our attitude in life. I feel positive about situations I would normally beat myself up before.

Finally, the most important thing I walk out from the program with is gaining trust in myself (feeling of empowerment), knowing that whatever happens in life, I have the tool to be free at anytime.

-D

 

"Never Diet Again" Online Summit

Imagine waking up tomorrow feeling comfortable in your own skin, knowing you are worthy and perfect just the way you are. Imagine having a positive relationship with food; no more stress, no more tension, just enjoyment and nourishment. There is no need to diet, restrict or hate your body for one more minute.



Click here to join us >>    http://bit.ly/neverdietagain10



The diet rollercoaster gets worse every time we diet. We may "know" this but still we think "but just one more time so I can get this weight off and THEN I will be done". Or we worry if we aren't dieting we will be lost. Because...what else is there?

I am stoked that Jenna & Lauren from The Body Love Society are doing a summit on just this called > NEVER DIET AGAIN: How to get off the diet rollercoaster, find balance and live a healthy life you actually enjoy.

And because you are part of the Life With Lydia team, you get a free ticket reserved just for you! :) 


 

Click here for your free ticket >>    http://bit.ly/neverdietagain10

 

This interview series is for you if you want to know how to ditch the diet once and for all and what you can do instead.

 If you would like to start making your life bigger instead of constantly trying to make yourself smaller then this speaker series is going to highlight how you can begin down this transformative path.

You will get insights into:

+ how to stop the body hate thoughts

+ how to create healthier habits without dieting

+ how to navigate a world obsessed with dieting

+ top tips on how to stop the food obsession

You will get useful advice from 22 of the top body image and anti-diet wellness experts on how to change your relationship with food, how you feel about your body and how to live a life full of joy and happiness that lets you no longer need to wait on the weight! 

I get questions about this all the time. I know it is a huge struggle, but the freedom on the other side is amazing. 

 

Get your free ticket here >>   http://bit.ly/neverdietagain10

 

PS : Be sure to reserve your spot so you don't miss my interview where I share my top tips on how to end binge eating and the diet cycle at the same time.

K's Story of Freedom

I tried so many diets in my life since I was a teenager.

I wanted to be thin and I was obsessed with food and rules about what to eat and which food is bad. But after a while I always rebelled against those restrictive rules and so I binged.

The binge phases became longer and longer until I got physical symptoms after I had binged that really scared me. I felt totally out of control, just stuffing food (especially sweets) into my mouth. I felt lost, doomed. And I was afraid I could pass this behaviour on to my daughter by being a bad example for her. I also imagined getting a severe illness because of all that unhealthy stuff. That was terrible! I wasted much time with bingeing and feeling stuffed and being unable to do anything but lying on my bed or on the couch.

Because of the Beat the Binge Program I know what to do with the urges to binge now. And these principles are easy. I don't feel out of control and doomed any longer. I still overeat from time to time but that's okay for me.

I started to accept the fact that my way to eat will never be perfect. And that's fine, that means more fun and freedom. No calorie counting or strict rules any longer. In the past I thought that I needed strict rules. Now I don't let others dictate what and when to eat. That's my decision because this is my life!

I also began to accept my body just the way it is. That's not easy, but it's getting easier. Giving up the diet mentality and working on body positivity are important issues in this program - for a good reason.

Now I feel better. The physical symptoms of eating so much unhealthy stuff, especially sweets, are almost gone completely. I also have more time and mental energy for other things which are important in my life.

K's Story of Freedom!

I struggled with an eating disorder for 20+ years. I started my first diet when I was 12 yrs old b/c I wanted to look like the models in “Teen” magazine. In addition, I was bullied and had horrible self-esteem. Together, it was the perfect storm for an eating disorder.

I spent the next 20 years, starving, binging, over-exercising, and being MASSIVELY depressed. I’ve spent probably over $200K on food, medical expenses, diet programs, supplements, gym memberships and clothes, all to support my disorder.

I used to go to the grocery store everyday, sometimes twice a day b/c I would eat all of my kids’ food before they came home from school. I would have to make a second trip to the store before they came home.

I’ve seen dozens of doctor and therapists. Along with that, I’ve have been prescribed dozens of medication and struggled with horrible hormonal imbalances. I’ve been diagnosed with infertility, adrenal fatigue, major depression, osteopenia, insomnia, IBS and I have been rushed to the ER twice for A-fib that results in me being cardioverted. The list goes on and on.....

My eating disorder has ruined multiple romantic relationships, one being a marriage. I’ve lost a ton of friendships as well. I’ve ruined vacations, dates, events, etc because of my binging/restricting and/or feeling fat and bloated. Regardless of my weight, I always felt hated my body.

My eating disorder occupied 90% of my time and thoughts. I have never held a full-time job because I couldn’t manage both career and eating disorder. I missed out on countless opportunities with my children, who have been greatly impacted by my eating disorder.

After working with Lydia, I have my life back! I do not have an eating disorder. I am a completely different person. Even though I never told anyone about this program, everyone can see a difference in me.

I don’t feel chained down and controlled by an eating disorder.

Just a few weeks into the program, I really started to grasp the fact that I didn’t have to believe my thoughts. It was like a light bulb went off and I couldn’t unsee it. I shattered my scale and stopped counting calories/macros. I started binging less and less.

I don’t love my body and that’s ok. I do, however, accept my body. I work on my body image issues everyday and am making progress day by day.

Now, I eat whatever I want every day. I don’t obsess over food and I stopped making daily trips to the grocery store. I have so much time to do the things I love and I am working more hours at work.

My relationships with my partner and my children have greatly improved. Mostly, because I am happier, have more energy and time, and can think clearer.

After spending years and years in therapy, I am shocked that I could be cured in 8 short weeks.

After week one of the program, I understood why I was binging/restricting. The remaining weeks, I spent practicing the principles to stop the behaviors. Slowly, week by week, I saw less binging and restricting.

One of my favorite parts of the program was the community of women. It is awesome to be a part of a group who knows exactly what you are going through. I could tell them my darkest eating disorder secrets and never once felt judged. Also, Lydia was with me throughout the entire program. I could reach out to her anytime of the day and she was always there to support me.

The live Q & A sessions were also a huge help. Hearing the questions and concerns that other women had, really added to my recovery.

Now, since I have so much time and energy, I want to improve other areas of my life. I didn’t even notice that my relationship with my partner had room for improvement. Now, I can work toward building an even better relationship. I also want to work more on my career and possibly find some hobbies and volunteer opportunities.

The possibility are endless. It’s great to be free!!!

-K

E's Story of Freedom!

Thank you so much for all your help. I think you may have cured me! I haven’t binged since I began the course with you. I was overeating for a while and I felt the strain of it on my body, but I told myself to be patient and that it was perfectly normal to allow my body to feel its way through this massive change. It felt right somehow and made sense that my body would need time to feel its way back to “normal” eating; and it did. I don’t even know when it happened. It was so gradual and natural. I can now hear what my body is telling me. I eat when I’m hungry, stop when I’m full and eat whatever I want! Not surprisingly, the foods my body wants most are fruits and veggies. I don’t feel deprived. I don’t feel like I’m restricting in any way. It feels natural and I believe I’m losing weight. I honestly don’t know, since I don’t weigh myself anymore, but my clothes feel looser and I feel better in my own skin. Does that make sense?

I barely have any stress around food. On the odd occasion that some chatter might pop up, because I understand what the chatter means, I can deal with it very quickly.

I’m happy. I feel healthier and my mood is steadier. I sleep better, I have tons of energy and I feel more mentally alert. That heavy sluggish feeling I had when I was binging and overeating is gone.

Thank you, thank you, thank you. You are my angel. I’m so happy I found you and finally received the right type of help.

I have some health issues, but whereas before being ill would’ve meant binging or overeating to comfort myself; I no longer use food for comfort in that way. It’s strangely liberating.

I’m reading more and I’m writing again! Two of my joys. I’m living life and find myself busier than I’ve been in years and now I have the energy to keep up!

I would recommend your course to absolutely everyone. It works! You have to put the work in and learn to be compassionate and patient towards yourself, but confronting the chatter works 100%!

I honestly cannot thank you enough.

- E